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Teenagers, Don't Read This Book!
You can also purchase a soft cover copy
here.
Synopsis
Chapters One through Three: Do not read this book, So you are back?, and Shall we get started?
These are rapport building chapters that allow teenagers to know the author
understands their experience. They are very short, succinct chapters so
teenagers can finish three chapters in a book within three to five short
minutes of reading, a grand accomplishment for most of them.
Chapter Four: You have needs
This chapter introduces teenagers to a model of therapy that is based
on emotional needs; the need to belong, the need to control, and the need
to love and be loved.
Chapter Five: The need to belong
The need to belong means fitting in, being liked and accepted. This chapter
identifies how teenagers satisfy their need to belong and gives examples
of feelings that happen as a result of not getting this need met.
Chapter Six: The need to control
The need to control means making choices without parents interfering.
This chapter explains how teenagers need to control their time, space,
and energy. It gives examples of feelings that result when that power
to control is usurped by authority figures.
Chapter Seven: The need to love and be loved
The importance of loving and being loved is discussed in this chapter.
Feelings that are generated when love needs are unmet are explained.
Chapter Eight: Unresolved primary feelings
The result of not getting these three basic emotional needs met in teenagers’
lives is called unresolved primary feelings. This chapter gives examples
of when these needs are not met. The feelings that result from those unmet
needs are discussed. Teenagers are shown how unresolved primary feelings
escalate to anger.
Chapter Nine: What happens to anger?
This chapter explains that acting out behavior and depression come from
anger. Examples of acting out behaviors are discussed. Depression is explained.
Chapter Ten: Start with a goal
This chapter explains what to do about anger. It gives teenagers a monitoring
question that helps keep them on track as they aim towards their goals.
Passion is discussed.
Chapter Eleven: Changing behaviors
If teenagers have not been getting to their goals, this chapter helps
them correct that deficit by discussing how to change behaviors. Examples
are given of how to effect a behavior change.
Chapter Twelve: Changing perspective
The grey area of life where possibilities are hidden is explained in this
chapter. Examples are given of how to generate a perspective change.
Chapter Thirteen: Communicating when you have a problem
This chapter teaches teenagers a way to talk to parents or peers when
their behavior is interfering with the teenagers’ needs.
Chapter Fourteen: Communicating when someone else has a problem
When someone has a problem with the behaviors exhibited by teenagers,
this chapter teaches teenagers how to respond to that criticism without
getting defensive.
Chapter Fifteen: A thousand responses
This chapter discusses how to deal with Mr. Failure. It shows that teenagers
have a thousand responses besides anger to help deal with unsuccessful
attempts. It gives examples of how to handle mistakes and failures.
Chapter Sixteen: A matter of attitude
Attitude is addressed in this chapter. It explains how flexibility and
adaptability are keys to success.
Chapter Seventeen: Making decisions and problem solving
This chapter teaches decision making and problem solving. It gives examples
from teenagers’ lives with which they can identify.
Chapter Eighteen: Responsibility, an awesome task
Taking personal responsibility for behavior is addressed in this chapter.
Suffering the consequences and reaping the benefits to obtain personal
power is discussed.
Chapter Nineteen: Responding to angry statements
This chapter teaches teenagers how to respond to angry statements from
parents without getting hooked into their own anger. A de-escalation of
emotionality model is explained.
Chapter Twenty: You are in charge of your life
This chapter emphasizes that teenagers are in charge of their own lives.
It discusses their lives in terms of a drama of which they are the producer.
Chapter Twenty-one: The success of your life is up to you
The concluding chapter affirms the position that success in life is up
to each teenager individually. Teenagers’ choices as well as their
responsibilities are in each of their hands.
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